Wednesday, August 24, 2011
"I hope I die before I get old."
My Generation, The Who.
Gua bukanlah seorang yang berharap akan umur panjang.
Growing old and frail adalah salah satu prospek yang tak menggiurkan bagi gua.
Tapi pakcik-pakcik dari Taiwan ini telah menunjukkan yang anda masih boleh menjadi tua tetapi tetap cool.
Kalau video ini masih tak inspire anda untuk kejar impian hidup, gua tak tahu apa lagi yang boleh motivate lu orang.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Gua ada satu benda yang gua tak faham dari dulu sampai sekarang.
Kenapa makcik-makcik warganegara Malaysia ini bila pergi makan angin, nafsu shopping gila rakus membuak-buak. Macam singa kena kurung sebulan tak makan dilepaskan dalam kandang kambing.
Ok, ini macam.
Bulan lepas gua merentas French Indochina. Siem Reap - Phnom Penh - Saigon.
Daripada pemerhatian gua, tempat terbaik untuk mencari rakan senegara adalah di restoran halal, dan juga tempat membeli belah.
Mula-mula gua rasa agak lawak juga tengok gerombolan makcik-makcik ini menggeladah habis semua deretan kedai-kedai yang ada di situ. Tapi bila dah lama-lama tengok, gua jadi agak ralat pula.
Contoh terbaik masa gua di Phnom Penh. Ada satu rombongan dari Kedah datang melawat ke Chong Euk Killing Field. Gua tengok makcik-makcik yang berjalan di situ langkahnya berat mukanya ketat. Bosan mungkin. Kemudian petang harinya gua jumpa balik rombongan ini di Russian Market. Masa ini bukan main lagi. Gua lalu sebelah saja gua dah boleh rasa aura hormon adrenalin mengalir laju dalam tubuh masing-masing.
Russian Market itu sudah la sesak, sempit, panas lagi tu. Tapi gua tengok makcik-makcik ini tetap tidak gentar dan terus berjuang membeli-belah.
Memang gua tak faham.
Saigon Night Market. Gua di Saigon ketika musim hujan. Boleh kata setiap hari gua di Saigon itu akan hujan cuma pattern hujannya lain sikit. Hujan akan turun mendadak lebat dan berlarutan dalam lebih kurang 30 hingga 45 minit. Kemudian ia akan berhenti sekaligus ataupun gerimis untuk jangka masa 20 minit lebih kurang.
Cuma masalahnya kalau di waktu malam, lu tak boleh agak bila nak hujan. Tengah jalan elok-elok tiada angin tiada apa terus turun mendayu-dayu. Nak tak nak terpaksa la gua berteduh di kaki lima bersama beratus-ratus penunggang motosikal Saigon yang lain.
Pasal gua dah lapar gila malam itu, hujan reda sikit gua terus sambung jalan. Gua mahu cari kedai Pho 2000. Katanya presiden Bill Clinton pernah makan situ. Bila berjalan melintas Night Market, gua perasan suasana agak lengang.
Gua pusing ke situ kejap pasal gua pun tak usha apa lagi ada di Night Market ini. Tak ramai orang lagi bagus. Gua tak suka sesak-sesak.
Bila sampai di situ, gua kagum dengan apa yang gua lihat. Makcik-makcik warganegara Malaysia masih gigih dan bersemangat waja melakukan aktiviti membeli-belah.
Gua rasa macam tak percaya. hampir majoriti di situ rakyat Malaysia. Dah rasa macam di Gerbang Malam, atau Uptown pula.
Mungkin sebab di itu Kemboja mahupun Vietnam, ramai saja peniaga yang boleh berbahasa Melayu basic.
"Kak, mari beli kain murah-murah.", "Abang, beli t-shirt."
Mungkin majoriti pembeli-pembelinya semua kakak-kakak, abang-abang dari Malaysia.
Ok, gua faham memang barang di situ murah. Gua angkat bagpack USD10, jam tangan Tag Heuer USD20, t-shirt di sini dalam 2-3 dolar sahaja. Tapi bila tengok makcik-makcik ini berbelanja, gua jadi pelik.
Sampai sekarang gua tak faham.
Gua boleh tahan lagi kalau semangat nak indulge dalam culture dan history sama banyak dengan semangat untuk shopping. Tapi kalau pergi dengan mindset shopping saja, gua tak tahu nak cakap apa la.
Teringat gua apa yang Mike Barish kata.
"There are travelers and there are tourists. Travelers explore new places, immerse themselves in diverse cultures and respect their experiences. Tourists gawk, point, mock and generally embarrass themselves while poorly representing their native cities and countries."
Monday, August 22, 2011
"Sorry sir, you cannot bring your friend to your room."
"Thats the rule sir. You must wait until 9 a.m."
Fucking hell. 9 a.m.? I can't wait for another two fucking long hour. I can barely keep my eyes open. Normally I dream of sleeping on a soft white feather with bed made of greased naked bodies but here, right now, I'll sleep on hot molten lava in heartbeat.
That receptionist guy really pissed Suzy off. Now she's arguing with him, in Vietnamese of course.
I'm just standing there, trying to figure out what they're saying. I'm crossing my finger and pray hard to the God of Playboy, hoping that the receptionist guy will let us slip this time.
Shit. I must've do something that pissed the God of Playboy before this.
Fuck you, God of Playboy.
Suzy just walk out in frustration.
"Your hotel, no good!", she said half-jokingly.
"So what's next? Got any idea?"
"You want to drink cà phê?
Cà phê is Vetnamese for coffee. As the second largest exporter of coffee, they really take their coffee seriously. Forget those overpriced franchised coffee. You can get much much better coffee with much much cheaper price here in Vietnam. What's the better way to spend the day than having a cà phê at the roadside stall and watch the crazy Saigon traffic passing by.
"Cà phê sữa đá. Two."
Cà phê sữa đá is strong, sweet ice coffee with condensed milk, also known as Kopi Ais Kaw.
"Where do you park your bike?", I asked Suzy.
"Near the Ben Thanh market."
"I think you should take a cab and head home. Get some rest. You can take your bike later."
"I'm ok. I can take the bike and go home. No need for taxi."
"No way I'm gonna let you ride the bike. You're drunk and tired and sleepy. You're not going to reach your smelly, messy room. You're gonna end up in clean, white-sheet bed in the hospital."
"Hey my room not messy ok!", she said to me smiling. That fucking smile.
"I hail a taxi for you, ok?"
"No I dont want. Can you wait until 8 a.m.?"
"Why?", I asked.
Shit. I'm battered enough already. I've been dozing off several times already, only to be awaken by Suzy's sweet little pinch. I don't want to wait. I just want to sleep.
"Wait until my friend go to work first."
"Why you want to wait until your friend go to work?"
"I don't want her to see you?"
"See me? What do you mean?"
"I want you to come with me to my house."
Wohoo! Thank you, God of Playboy.
Lord, I seek forgiveness from thou. Please forget what I said earlier.
"You don't have to do that. I can see you already tired. You should head back home now and get some rest. If you want me to come with you, you have to wait for another 30 minutes. That just not necessary. We can meet later tonight. I have no problem sleeping 'alone' in my hotel room.", I said, trying to be cheeky, with the alone part is emphasized.
"No. I want you to come with me. I want to show you my room is not messy ok."
Oh boy, here we go.......
to be cont...
Friday, August 19, 2011
Saigon scooter adventure, July 2011
Argh my head. It feels like exploding. What types of substances that I abuse last night? I feel really trashed right now.
What the....? Where the fuck am I? This is not my hotel room. Holy shit there's a girl laying beside me. Is she dead? No. She's still breathing. Thank God.Where I am right now? Why there is a girl sleeping beside me? What the fuck happened last night?
OK relax. Calm down. Think motherfucker, think!
"Good morning, Dani. You wake up already?"
"Morning? Its 4 o' clock in the evening.", I said.
"I know. I just joking."
Shit, now she wants to cuddle with me. Well, come to think of it, its not shitty at all. So cuddle it is.
"You hungry, my Malaysian stallion?"
Malaysian stallion? Now that is new.
"Lets go eat.", she added. "You want to eat Vietnamese?"
"Yeah, sure. But I've to go to the toilet first"
After the toilet, I went straight downstair. She's already waiting for me. Then she shows me a picture.
"Oh. Your family back in....."
We walk together to the restaurant through the small alley of her neighbourhood. The houses here is typical Saigon building. Tiny and narrow, each with distinct colour and architecture. Its crude and unplanned.
"What you want to eat?"
"I don't know. Just order something that I can eat without using the chopsticks."
I fucking hate chopsticks.
The the food came. Some meat with chips. It look more Western than Vietnamese actually. And more importantly, no chopsticks.
Wow, the food is actually not bad. Not bad at all.
"What are you looking? Why you not eat?"
"Nothing. Suzy...", suddenly I remember her name "..what exactly happened.."
"Nothing. Just forget it."
"When you go back to Malaysia?"
"You come Vietnam see me again, ok?"
"3 month, ok? Come Vietnam and see me again."
And then she smiled. That smiled that drives me crazy last night. My sweet little Suzy.
"Of course I want to see you again. You wait for me in Saigon ok?"
She took my hand and we just sit there staring at the bustling Saigon traffic, sharing some moment of comfortable silence while my mind still racing trying to figure out what happened last night. There's some hazy flashback here and there but still I can't put the puzzle pieces together.
"Suzy, I have to go. Its already 5.30. I got something to do at 6 p.m."
"Ok. But promise me that you come and see me tonight."
"Same time same place?"
So I catch a cab and head back to my hotel. I got a scooter tour tonight and I can't afford to miss it since I already paid for it.
Before I left, I catch a glimpse of Suzie for the last time. No way I'm going to meet her tonight. She seems serious with me. Its time for me to bail. Always follow the playboy codes.
There she was. Standing all waving and cheerful.
My sweet little Suzy.
The cab stopped. Suzy told to me that we have arrived at her home but we still have to walk around the block because the alley is too small for a car to pass through. Suzie is stone dead drunk and she's stumbling all over the place with her high heels. Its like holding a baby who still learning how to walk properly.
We arrived at her house after about 10 minutes of walking, or should I say stumbling. Quite small but comfy. Then she takes me upstairs and show me my room.
"You can sleep here.", she said.
"This is your room?"
"No. I sleep at other room."
Shit. I thought I'm going to sleep with her. Well, nevermind. I'm so tired I just want to sleep anyway. I've gone more than 24 hour without sleeping. The mix of all type of substances and stimulants now taking its toll on me.
I'm so tired I just want to slee...
"I thought you said you sleep at the other room?"
She didn't say anything and gives me a sinister looking smile. That fucking smile.
We have a little chit-chat while I stroke her hair. That I went quite and just stare at her. Trying to build up the tension.
I just smiled at her.
"Why you keep looking at me like that?"
And then after a brief moment I said, "How about it then?"
She smiled, and makes her move.
And I just surrender myself to her lovely, tender arms.
to be continued...